My Child Is Pulling Out Their Eyelashes: What to Do

If you’ve noticed your child pulling out eyelashes, perhaps at bedtime or in front of the TV, you’re probably worried about their eyes and unsure what to say. You’re not alone, and neither is your child: eyelashes are one of the most common places people pull from.

This guide covers why it happens, whether it’s trichotillomania, whether it harms their eyes, how long lashes take to grow back, and what helps.

Why is my child pulling out their eyelashes?

Most children pull their lashes because it brings a feeling of relief, satisfaction or calm, and their brain learns to go back to it. It isn’t naughtiness, attention-seeking or self-harm, and it isn’t something you caused.

Common patterns include:

A lash that “feels wrong”. Many people who pull their lashes say one bothers them when they blink. They feel for it, pull it, and feel better for a moment.
Quiet, still moments. Bedtime, reading, homework, car journeys and screen time are common times, because hands are free and attention is elsewhere.
Boredom, tiredness or worry. Pulling can rise when a child is under-stimulated or stressed.

Younger children tend to pull more automatically, without noticing they’re doing it, while older children and teenagers more often pull in a focused way. Many children who pull their eyelashes pull their eyebrows too.

Is it trichotillomania?

It probably is if your child pulls out their lashes again and again, it’s causing noticeable lash loss, they’ve tried to stop but can’t, and it upsets them or gets in the way of daily life. Trichotillomania is a body-focused repetitive behaviour (BFRB): one of a group of conditions where people repeatedly pull, pick or bite at their own hair, skin or nails.

Age matters. Pulling in toddlers and very young children often stops on its own and is usually a way of self-soothing. Our guide to toddlers pulling hair covers this younger group. Our complete guide to trichotillomania explains the condition in full.

Lashes can also fall out for other reasons, so it’s worth ruling these out with a doctor:

Cause	What you might notice
Trichotillomania	Patchy gaps, often on the upper lids, with lashes of different lengths; you may see your child touching or pulling
Blepharitis (inflamed lid edges)	Itchy, red, swollen or crusty eyelid edges, sometimes burning
Alopecia areata (the immune system attacks hair follicles)	Smooth patches of hair loss, often on the scalp or brows as well
Thyroid problems	Thinning of lashes and other hair, with other changes such as in weight
Styes or eyelid infections	A sore lump or a red, tender eyelid

Is pulling out eyelashes harmful to my child’s eyes?

Pulling doesn’t usually affect eyesight directly, but it can irritate and damage the delicate skin of the eyelid. The American Academy of Ophthalmology says people who pull their lashes often have a higher risk of eye injury, scarring and infection. Lashes also keep dust and grit out of the eyes.

Encourage handwashing, since fingers carry germs to the lid edge, and ask a pharmacist or doctor whether an eye ointment would soothe sore lids.

Will my child’s eyelashes grow back?

In most cases, yes. When a lash is pulled, the follicle underneath (the tiny pocket in the skin that grows it) is usually still there, and it starts a new lash in its own time.

Lashes grow back a little at a time. The first short lashes can appear within weeks; a full lash line can take several months.

Each lash grows for about 4 to 10 weeks, rests, then falls out; the whole cycle takes around 4 to 11 months. Because every follicle is at a different point, regrowth is uneven at first: a few short, fine lashes, then a fuller line over the following months. Pulling a regrowing lash starts its clock again.

Repeated pulling over a long time can slow regrowth, and some lashes may not come back. That’s a reason to get support sooner, not to panic. Avoid lash-growth serums unless a doctor recommends one: those that work have side effects such as eye irritation and darkening of the skin or iris, and none touches the urge to pull. Our guide to pulling out eyelashes explains lash serums in more detail.

What helps a child who pulls their eyelashes?

Behavioural therapy has the best evidence for children, and simple changes at home help too: noticing pulling, making it a little harder, and giving hands something else to do.

Things you can try together:

Notice the risky times. Keep a quiet note of when and where pulling seems to happen, without watching your child’s face.
Glasses at reading and screen time. Ordinary glasses or sunglasses put a gentle barrier in front of the lashes.
Busy hands. A stress ball, a stretchy or textured fidget, or squeezing a fist for a minute when an urge comes. Keep one wherever your child tends to pull.
Bedtime support. A soft toy to hold, or plasters on fingertips or thin cotton gloves if your child likes the idea.
Praise effort, not lashes. Notice when they reach for a fidget. Never take away treats for pulling.

Glasses at reading time, a fidget for busy hands, and a soft toy to hold at bedtime.

Therapy. Habit Reversal Training (HRT) is a behavioural therapy that teaches children to spot the moments before they pull and to do something else with their hands instead. In a randomised trial of 24 children aged 7 to 17, those given eight weekly sessions improved much more than those given a few brief check-ins, and kept their gains for the next two months. The three youngest, aged 7 to 9, did at least as well as older children, though that’s a very small number. The UK’s NHS lists habit reversal as the main treatment for trichotillomania. Our guide to Habit Reversal Training explains how it works.

Medication and supplements. No medicine is approved for trichotillomania in children. In a 12-week trial of 39 children and teenagers, the supplement N-acetylcysteine (NAC) worked no better than a dummy pill, and the researchers advised trying behavioural therapy first. Speak to a doctor or pharmacist before giving your child any supplement or medicine.

What should I say to my child?

Keep it short, kind and blame-free. You might say: “I’ve noticed your eyelashes are a bit patchy. Lots of children pull their lashes without meaning to. You’re not in trouble. Shall we work out together what might help?”

Try not to tell them to “just stop” or point out each pull. Scolding adds shame, and pulling moves out of sight. For more ideas on words that help, read our guide to talking to your child about hair pulling.

When should I get help?

Get support if pulling has gone on for more than a few weeks, lashes are visibly missing, your child seems upset, or their eyes are sore. You don’t need to wait until it’s “bad enough”.

Start with your GP. They can check your child’s eyes and lids, rule out other causes, and refer your child for therapy if needed.

Many doctors and therapists have never worked with a child who pulls. Everyone in our directory has told us they understand trichotillomania and already help people who pull, in person or online. You can search the directory for someone who understands hair pulling. Our guide for parents of children with trichotillomania covers school, family life and more. The Parent’s Guide to Trichotillomania is about understanding what your child is going through.

If your child seems very low or hopeless, or talks about hurting themselves, please talk to someone today.

In an emergency, call 112 or 999 or go to your nearest emergency department.

Samaritans — 116 123 (www.samaritans.org/samaritans-ireland)
Pieta — 1800 247 247 (text HELP to 51444) (www.pieta.ie)
Text About It — text HELLO to 50808

Questions people ask

Is it normal for a young child to pull out their eyelashes?

Pulling in toddlers and very young children is fairly common and often stops on its own, especially when it’s part of settling to sleep. It’s still worth mentioning to your child’s doctor if it carries on for months, if lashes are disappearing, or if their eyes look sore.

Should I stop my child’s hand when I see them pulling?

Try not to grab their hand or tell them off. It adds shame, and pulling often moves out of sight. Instead, agree a private, friendly signal together, or quietly hand them a fidget. Let your child choose whether they want reminders at all.

Does my child pull because they’re anxious or unhappy?

Not necessarily. Stress can make pulling worse, but many children pull most when they’re bored, tired or absorbed in something, such as reading or a screen. Pulling isn’t a sign that something is wrong at home or that you’ve done anything wrong as a parent.

My child puts their eyelashes in their mouth. Is that a problem?

Some children touch pulled lashes to their lips or chew them. Mention it to your child’s doctor. If your child swallows hair and has stomach pain, feels or is sick, or loses weight, see a doctor promptly, because swallowed hair can build up in the stomach.

Should I tell my child’s school about eyelash pulling?

Only if your child agrees, and on their terms. A short note to a trusted teacher can help them handle questions from other children and quietly allow a fidget in class. Many children would rather keep it private, and that’s their choice to make.

Will my child pull out their eyelashes forever?

Not necessarily. Pulling often comes and goes over the years, with quieter spells and harder ones, and stress can bring it back. Behavioural therapy has helped children in research studies, and the skills your child learns now can be picked up again whenever they need them.